Life x Living

Did you miss me? No..Oh. lol. I have like totally neglected my blog..shame on me. Since writing is something that I love to do, you'd think I'd dedicate more time to it. Anway, I'm back at it.

I felt like blogging today, mainly just to talk to myself and maybe give myself some encouragement. As I type, I hope that my words serve as some type of comfort to myself. I've been having really good days lately, which I'm very thankful for. But these past two days, I just haven't been able to shake this sucky mood I've been having. One would think that after a week off, which included a few days at the beach that I'd be refreshed and renewed right? Yeah..I know. I've tried sleeping it off & staying to myself after work, but it isn't working. Maybe I'm just having a "moment"..or maybe it's something bigger than that. I've considered going back to journaling and writing with the hope that either of the two may help.

Sometimes I wonder if my "happiness" that I give off is just a cover-up for how I truly feel about my life. I'd like to believe that I'm genuinely happy, but I honestly don't know if I am. I feel like there is a void in my life. Not just because of my son, but something else that I can't quite figure out. Yes, I've been through a lot...but I still think I deserve love and to be happy and things of that nature. I tell myself that when it's "my" time, the things that I know I am deserving of will come to me. I'm sure there are some people who probably wonder why I don't self medicate myself or drink myself into oblivion due to my past. My answer is simple, what would any of that change? Nothing. My past would still be just that. My past. I can't change what has happened thus far. Although I wish I could. Now, do I think of doing those things sometimes? Of course I do. I'd be lying if I said I didn't. But I know that in the end, those are just outlets for me to run to, but they won't solve anything. Eventually when I came down off my high (if I lived through it) I'd feel shittier than I did before.

So far I've learned that life is all about experiences and timing. The experiences are what molds us into being the individuals that we are. Timing doesn't always work in our favor...The other day I was thinking of the phrase, "Two ships passing in the night". I interpret that phrase to mean something like two things that always just miss each other, or are so close but never able to reach each other. This is kinda how I feel about my life lately. I know what I want, and what I'm ready for...but it still doesn't feel with in reach. *sigh*

SSK!

Ok..I know you may be wondering..what does SSK mean? It stands for Single Strand Knots. My fellow curlies in the Natural Hair community know JUST what I am talking about. They are these annoying, tiny knots that form at the ends of our curls. I have really been in denial lately about my SSK's. I have been putting off cutting them. Today, I got fed up and started snipping! If I wasn't at work, I would have kept going. LOL. I'm going to finish the job tonight.

Ladies, trimming those knots is a MUST. The longer you put off trimming them, the worst they can get. If you wait too long, you will find yourself needing a "cut" instead of a "trim". I think I caught mine just in time.

How do you handle your SSK? Do you trim them right away? Do you carry hair shears in your purse (like me)? LOL. Share your thoughts!

xoxo, adria

A Breath of Fresh Air

Today has really brought joy to my heart. There has been a lot of sadness in my heart lately, but today reminded me that after a storm...the sun does shine. My cousin gave birth to her second son this afternoon! He's another little bundle to add to the list of infants in my life. His birth could not have come at a more perfect time. A new life is like a breath of fresh air. Our family really needed some great news, and today we got it. And we even received smiles to go with it! Today has been a day of no worries for me. I have smiled so much!

Happy Birthday Baby Jase & Welcome! You truly are God's gift and there are so many people who love you already. I can't wait to see your sweet face!!

xoxo

Weathering the Storms x The Love of Family

"When it rains, it pours..". This is a quote that has rang so true in my life lately. My family and I suffered another tragic loss recently...the loss of my uncle (my father's only brother). It was unexpected and literally knocked the wind out of me. I had just arrived back on the East Coast from being on travel, when I heard the news. Nothing could have prepared me for that type of homecoming. Through my tears, I have still been able to find comfort. Before I left for travel, I had a long convo with my uncle. We talked about life, him dating (or no dating as he put it LOL) and him wanting to start attending my church. That was the last time I would ever hear his voice. I felt so much sorrow for my grandma, because now she too knows what it feels like to loss a child. I told her that in time, the heartache that she feels will get easier to handle. She is a strong and faithful woman who keeps her trust in God.

It's a New Day

It's been forever (or so it seems) since I've last blogged. I guess I've had a case of writer's block. Well first off, Happy New Year and all that jazz! I hope you had a nice and safe holiday. This was my first Christmas & New Year without my son. I was dreading the holiday season since November. I didn't think I would be able to handle the holidays. For Christmas the only thing I wanted was to wake up and be happy...instead of crying and feeling sad all day. Thankfully, my Christmas day was a peaceful one. The days leading up to New Years Eve seemed to be harder for me than anticipating the holidays. I made it through it all though & for that I'm grateful.

I always say that life is such a precious gift. Tomorrow is never promised so it's important to tell those you care for how you feel. I did something I usually don't do and that was send out Christmas cards to a few close family and friends. I wanted to make a point to tell them just how much they mean to me..not just around the holidays. But everyday.

Hidden Treasures

I've been listening to this cd for a few weeks now. I loved it instantly. "A Song For You" plays on repeat in my car...If you're a fan of her music (or maybe you've never really been into her) check it out. You may enjoy it :)

Be Blessed.

Holidays..Relationships..and that L word

Re·la·tion·ship noun A connection, association, or involvement. An emotional or other connection between people. A sexual involvement; affair. -Courtesy of www.dictionary.com

Have you ever had someone tell you that you need to be dating? Or how about telling you that you need to be in relationship? I have had all of this and even someone ask me why am I still single. Just recently someone mentioned to me that it is the holidays, I need to date. I literally laughed out loud at that. Who knew that the holidays meant you had to be in a relationship/dating? ::shrugs::

Seasons

"Our lives consist of seasons. A lot of us get impatient when the good seasons aren't happening fast enough in our lives. While it's impossible for every part of our lives to be perfect at all times, it can still be positive. Our attitudes are a direct reflection of the type of lives we live. Be positive and encouraged and remember that....Good things always come to those who wait."

The above paragraph is a post that I made earlier today on Facebook. I wanted to get more in depth about it on here. I titled this blog "Seasons" to mean change. Kind of like how the seasons change through out the year. That is how our lives are. One week you could be having a great week and the next week it feels like everything is just going wrong. Sometimes we can't control the mood of the our lives, but we can control our attitudes as well as our level of patience. It took me a while to learn that things don't happen over night nor do they happen right when you want them to. We have to learn to be patient and make the best out of any situation whether it's good or not so good. There's a lesson to be learned from each day that we are alive. My hope for you, if you're reading this is that you've learned a lesson today. One that you can take an apply to tomorrow.

Enjoy the seasons that come in your life. If you're currently experiencing a sad one, just know that your tears won't last always and your days won't always be dark. If it's anything you can do to bring light to your darkness, do it. If it's out of your control, accept that and keep pressing forward. Good things for you are right around the corner. I hope you believe AND receive this.

xoxo, adria

Bow My Head

A few months ago, I began to question my "faith". I was angry, bitter and down right unhappy. I really really wanted to blame God for the tragedy that I had experienced. During that time, I found myself sad a lot. Most days I was depressed and cried. I realize now what I was doing differently. I had stopped praying. I was holding on to all of my hurt and anger...keeping it deep inside. I know now that was doing me more harm than good.

Earlier today I had an awesome conversation with first, my mother than with my cousin. Both of them really helped to bring me back down to where I needed to be and I'm sure they didn't even know it. Once I was done talking with them, I bowed my head. I felt my heart was still a bit heavy and I knew what was soon to follow. Tears. I was at work and I really didn't want to feel "that way" while I was not in the privacy of my own home or car. My 5 minute prayer session allowed me to release what I was feeling at the time. I really felt lighter after I had done so.

"Don't Sweat The Small Stuff"

Photo Credit: Google Images

I know, I know...this post is overdue. I haven't really had anything I wanted to blog about lately. The other day I was just reflecting and thinking about some things. I always hear people talking or see them writing about how their lives are this and their lives are that.....which brings me to this:

Everyday you wake up, you're negative. Every 30 minutes you have something negative to say. You whine and complain about any and everything. You are constantly talking about people, even those who you claim as your "friends" & then wonder why you can't find love or people who genuinely care about you. According to you, nothing in your life is going right. My question to you is this: If your life is so BAD why are you still here? Have you ever considered that maybe YOU are the common denominator as to why bad things are constantly happening to you? It really annoys me when people are never happy with anything. The mere fact that you're alive and able to walk freely is a blessing. You could be moving yourself around in a wheelchair, or on crutches, etc. I swear this world is filled with a bunch of negative ass people who are always crying and complaining. 90% of the stuff they complain about are not even THAT serious.

Sisterly Love

Photo Credit: Google Images

I've been a fan of Tia & Tamera wayyyy back when they had their show, Sister Sister. I used to want my hair curly like them (but never could get it because I wore relaxers then), super long and straight, and I even wanted a twin! They were soooooo cool to me. Seeing them all grown up now makes me beam lol. I know, I'm corny..judge me! Anyway, their new show on Style is a favorite of mine. I don't really follow "reality" t.v. these days because most of what you see is NOT reality. The majority of it is pure garbage and stuff I can't even watch around my own 8 yr old sister. However, Tia and Tamera's show is definitely one to be seen. Back in the day, I could never tell them apart. They were identical or so I thought. I can really tell them apart now, not just because one was pregnant either. Their personalities are like night and day. Here's a little background info on them: Tia plays Melanie on the hit show The Game (on BET) <--can't wait for that show to return soon! She and her hubby Cory are new parents a baby boy named Cree and Tamera is getting back into acting and is newly married to Fox News Correspondent, Adam Housley. Got it? Good.
I admire their sisterly love and the fact that they seems to be truly genuine gals. They are very big on family and so am I. Their family is "deeply religious" too which you don't hear about too often these days. It's cool to finally see a good show that's worth watching weekly. They just aired their season finale last night *weeps* so I'm a little sad about that..lol. Anywho, if you're looking for a good show this is definitely one to watch. You can catch re-runs of their first season on Style.


PEACE!

HUMBLE x THANK YOU

Wow! I am truly humbled & appreciative of each and every one of you who has taken time to read my first entry! I really was nervous to start this blog. I knew that once I hit "publish post" yesterday that, that was..THAT! Of course I could have always deleted it, but you know what I mean. Your comments through here, Facebook, Twitter and word of mouth have really touched my heart. I hope that you will continue to enjoy my many entries to come.


As I said yesterday, it will be a peak into my life..not just about my tragedy, but things that interest me or whatever I want to share for the world to see/read. Although my "story" is a HUGE part of my life, it doesn't define me and who I am and continue to grow to be. Yesterday I tweeted that I'm still a work in progress, but I LOVE who I have become. I didn't always love myself...I know that sounds crazy right? But it's true. I never had problems loving others, family members, friends, etc. But when it came to myself, sometimes I just didn't. Through my current trials I've grown and learned to love myself unconditionally and accept that sometimes things just happen. Learning to love yourself is a must if you expect to have someone else love you. <--TRUTH. Well, this is just a short (well it was supposed to be) entry to say thanks again, again, & again for reading..commenting..and most of showing me love.

Peace & Love

Life

I guess this is where I introduce myself...tell what my "blog" will be about and things of that nature. The truth is, I'm not sure what exactly my blog will be about. What I do know is, this will be a place I can share my thoughts & and interests as well as a peak into my life.

I've never really been one who opens up to the "world" and shares my life with everyone. I've always tried to choose carefully who I allow to share in it. You might be wondering why I named my blog "strengthfromlove". Well, it means just that...strength comes from love. I've learned that it's when you're faced with the hardest adversities that you're still able to find strength in love. It can be the love from your family, friends or even the love you have for yourself.

This past summer I experienced the most unthinkable tragedy...my 1 year old son named Aiden unexpectedly passed away. Everyone that knows me, knows how deeply connected we were/are. He was my world and the air that I breathed. My life as I knew it would never be the same. For months I've felt like I was dying and living a terrible nightmare. It seems that everyone now knows my "story" and relates to me as Adria, who lost her son. I thought I'd never be able to make it through this and continue to live my life without my him. Aiden taught me the true meaning of love and what it means to embrace every moment of everyday. We as people can get caught up in our everyday lives and forget to cherish the small things.